30s and Thinking

I haven’t been able to update my blog recently, as I’ve been feeling really nervous and worried about my career in Japan. I know I should have continued writing down my thoughts, even during tough times, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Although some organizations have recognized my past experiences—including my working holiday in New Zealand—I’ve found it difficult to take the next step forward. Perhaps I need to explain more clearly why I’ve already left two jobs in Japan. After all, some Japanese employers place a lot of importance on how long someone had stayed at their previous workplaces.

I submitted my CV and career details to several universities yesterday and today. Fortunately, I gained experience working as a customer service staff member at an automotive shop in New Zealand. I can definitely leverage this background in workplaces that require communication with people from different countries. I hope to secure a new job as soon as possible.

I’ve been feeling anxious about my job search, as I’ve faced several rejections from companies I applied to before finishing my working holiday. Walking through central Tokyo makes me especially nervous—it feels as though everything around me is moving at a relentless pace.

I have applied to several organisations and universities, as I hope to work as an administrative staff member who assists students or local communities with their studies or livelihood. However, the reality is not easy, and I have spent the hardest time so far. Of course, I could have had some interviews with several of them, but the outcome was not what I had hoped.

I realized how convenient Japan is after returning to Japan. I had sometimes felt pressure due to noise and many buildings before going to New Zealand. However, I could notice how friendly the environment I can stay in is through various experiences, such as going to a hospital, using public local transportation and participating in local communities. If I had not tried a working holiday, I might have looked at only the downsides of Japan. Therefore, I truly appreciate my wife's understanding. 

Today marks the end of my working holiday in New Zealand. I'm deeply grateful for everything that has happened here—my flatmate, friends, workplace, and the local communities. I've experienced both joyful moments and challenging times. It was challenging to decide to come here without my wife. I know it was an uncommon choice, and perhaps nobody truly understood it, especially back in Japan. When I first arrived, I often questioned whether this path had any meaning. But now, having completed this journey, I can say with confidence: My decision was absolutely right. I leave with no regrets. Thank you so much, New Zealand.

I finally left my flat this morning. I already miss my flatmate—he's been such a kind and reliable person. Still, we didn’t cry; we simply exchanged a warm farewell.

I have only 2 days left in New Zealand. I gave some gifts to my friend and my flatmate because I am grateful to them during my working holiday. I have almost finished packing my belongings into my suitcase. I will clean everything in my room without leaving anything dirty.

My friend gave me a ballpoint pen today, and I’m truly delighted. I’ll use it with care from now on. I deeply appreciate her kindness and support, especially during our time studying together at language school. I hope she continues to get along well with her friends and achieves everything she wishes for. As for me, I’ll finish packing my belongings and clothes into my suitcase by tomorrow, since I need to leave my current home on Wednesday. 

I have used up my fourth shoes. Those heel parts are worn out, and the inner parts already stick out. I have used these for my work, walking and running because they fit my feet properly. I had a lot of fun times with them during my working holiday.

I expected Japan to perform a bit better, but this is the reality—South Africa played flawlessly throughout the game. Japan couldn’t find any space or break through the relentless pressure. I hope the team takes a well-deserved rest and focuses fully on the next match, free from criticism.

While summer is approaching in New Zealand, winter is just around the corner in Japan. I always apply sunscreen to my arms, neck, and face to protect my skin from burning. Today is my last Saturday here. From now on, each day will be my last—because I’m leaving next Friday.